The Symphony

Last night was my first experience watching the symphony on my own.  I’d gone with my class in 4th grade for one of those “get ya into it” field trips and seen the Utah Symphony play with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir but this time was the first time just seeing them.

IT WAS AMAZING!!!!!!! I can’t believe how fantastic it all was! We were in the 3rd row, right side of the orchestra. Arild Remmereit conducted. Ralph Matson was first chair violin.  We could actually watch the sweat on the musicians faces! LOL!! The first set was Johannes Brahms, Symphony No. 3 in F major, op. 90.  They played all four movements – Allegro con brio, Andante, Poco allegretto (my personal favorite), and Allegro-Un poco sostenuto.  I loved it.  The gentle sway of the music, the perfect timing of each instrument – fantastic!

Intermission came sooner than I thought, I was so caught up in the music.  My friend Ashley and I went to look around Abravanel Hall.  As we were on our way back to our seats we stopped at a desk to ask about season tickets for next year.  They gave us tickets to the after party!

We rushed back to our seats to inform our other friend Jessica, who seemed nothing but annoyed at our giddy excitement.  I laughed because I realized I was officially a Utah Symphony fan. I wanted nothing more than to go and hang out at the after party.

The symphony collected and Arild Remmereit returned to conduct along with special guest Natalie Clein playing the cello during Sir Edward Elgar’s concerto for violoncello in E minor, op. 85. Adagio-Moderato, Allegro molto, Adagio, Allegro-Moderato-Allegro, ma non troppo.  The first movement surprised me!  I’d recognized the movement before, hoping that it wasn’t just my previous listening to Yo-Yo Ma’s performance with the Chicago Symphony… It wasn’t until I got home last night and I popped in the movie “August Rush” when I realized that during the concert in the park scene that Lilah’s performance is actually the first movement of Elgar’s Cello Concerto! AWESOME!!

Natalie performed an on-cour selection that had been written for the symphony 2 days prior.  It was good, but not my favorite.  It seemed a little choppy in parts which was probably due to it’s composition 2 days prior.  Originally it was for cello and piano and the composer split it up and made it for cello and orchestra.

Natalie left and they finished the symphony with Alberto Ginastra’s Estancia: Four Dances, op. 8a.  The Land Workers, Wheat Dance (my favorite), The Cattlemen, Final Dance: Malambo…

The Final Dance: Malambo, was left in my head all night!  I kept tapping it on the tables as we went out for pie at JB’s Restaurant afterwords. My friends were totally convinced I had way too much sugar that night, not true.  I just had WAY TOO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!

I recommend the Utah Symphony to anyone looking for an exciting time of culture!  I’m first and foremost – forever a fan of the Utah Symphony!

A Time For Reflection.

Tonight is the dream I thought I might never have.  At 8pm I’ll be sitting in Abravanel Hall along side the orchestra listening to the Utah Symphony performing Elgar’s Cello Concerto.  I’ll want to soak in every detail of the room… The way people look, the colors, the lights, the sounds… Everything I’ve seen in movies or read in books.  But even more so, I’ll remember what it took to get there.

This year has definitely been a different twist for me.  Though at times it’s been tricky, I’m starting to become the person I’ve always wanted to be. Let’s just say when I was younger my living was very humble.  Education wasn’t huge for our family.  We got by with what we had.  There was no fancy living for us.  I was always embarrassed to invite people to our home because of where we lived.  Our family moved from the Boston, MA area in 1989 due to the economy and the fates kept chasing us everywhere we went.  It was hard for my parents.  Neither of them had gone to college.  Dad worked while mom was at home.  Eventually the tables turned and my mom worked while my dad was at home. My mom decided to better herself and took night college classes to eventually get her degree. There was a lot of stress in our family because of economics…  I think I was about 12 or so, maybe younger when I vowed I’d do whatever I had to in order to not be in the situation my parents were in.  I remember during classes in high school I’d be the only one who wouldn’t raise my hand when teachers would ask who was going to college.  I’d always be asked to explain my reasoning and I’d retort with a lie “My parents never went and they’re fine.”

I was always interested in art.  My dad was an artist.  I’d beg him to help me with drawings at the young age of 5.  I remember his shop in Dracut, MA where he’d carve wood signs for businesses around MA.  They were beautiful!  I loved watching him carve the wood – curly shavings would be hand cut off, smooth as butter.  When we moved to Utah I remember watching him create the wood sign that now sits in front of Alpine Aviation at the Provo Airport.  I watched him paint the gold onto each letter… the loop in the A for some reason was my favorite part.

When I was 18 I remember watching TV and seeing a spot for Provo College’s graphic design program.  I’d bombed in high school and been told several times that I’d never make it to college.  I’d started believing it until that day.  My mom took me into the school, I sat down with an adviser and I started college with a lingering pit in my stomach about the amount of student loans it’d take to get me there.  I went there for 2 years (half part time half full time)… I got to my last term, I had 4 classes left to take and I’d graduate.  I was burnt out and seriously wanted a break before I left on my mission.  I left school and then a few months later started noticing some really funny/odd things happening with my student loans… They were higher than I thought they were supposed to be.  I went in and demanded to find out what was happening with my money and pill grants I’d signed up for and supposedly had.  The school informed me that I never was given pill grants even though I qualified for them; they just hiked up my student loans and took that money.  When they didn’t use money they’d hold onto it for later use instead of giving it back to me or sending it back to UHEA.  I was FURIOUS!  This caused several hundreds of dollars in interest!  I demanded they give me whatever money I had left, which they did, I took that money and used it towards my mission and figured I’d just transfer to another school with all the credits I had and finish up there.  I’d been on the dean’s list and had a good GPA.  Provo College had told me my credits would transfer anywhere and I’d be fine.

I left on my mission, came home, and tried to get into BYU.  Did it happen? NO.  Why, because they don’t even look at Provo College as an educational institution.  I was told I could go to UVSC (now UVU), study there for a few terms, boost up my GPA and then try again.  I went to UVSC (UVU) and sat down with them only to have my heart shattered to learn I they also didn’t look at Provo College as and educational institution and NONE of my credits would transfer.  I could still get into UVSC, no problem, but I’d have zero credits and I was discouraged in taking any student loans because I’d already used almost $20,000 of the $40,000 the US Government allows a first year student.  I would have to start at square one all over again!  Provo College was never an accredited college and many other graduates from Provo College have tried to go to different schools to continue their education only to find that they can’t.

It started out small. Or at least I’d like to think it did.  It went REALLY fast!  I started a job as a retail sales associate in a baby-clothing store making an amazing $7.00 an hour.  I had no car and relied on my parents and eventually roommates for help.  That lasted the summer of 2007 until I was offered a job as a Special Education Pera-Professonal at an elementary school making $8.50 an hour.  I took the job and then within 2 months got a car.   I also started school at UVSC.  I really enjoyed the job, the children were fantastic to work with and I was learning so much about them.  Though I was struggling with the way my boss treated them.  I asked my dad for a priesthood blessing and was counseled to stay as long as I could in that job and I’d be blessed with a job in my field.   In December 2007 through the advice of my bishop I packed up my things and moved to Provo, UT.  Officially my first real apartment on my own.  I planned to drive back and forth from Provo to Cedar Hills for work but things started getting worse with my boss.  I turned in an application at an embroidery company as a trimmer making $9.00 but instead was offered a job as their graphic designer at $10.00!  I worked there from December to March until the environment became sour.  I was hired as their graphic designer but they also wanted me as their office assistant manager.  I started noticing illigal activity then turned to my dad for another blessing.  I was counseled to find another job.  I started looking.  I had my first interview on a Friday and then that next Monday I was fired.  Within 3 days I found another job for a small business as a graphic designer,  “Chief Designing Officer” as one of my co-workers labeled me.  My pay was $10.00. I started work on my 23rd birthday.   They even threw me a party!  I enjoyed my job a lot until the day I had surgery and they fired me.  Their actions were illegal and I brought it to their attention and I was rehired.  I stayed with them another 2 months until I was offered the job I have now as a graphic designer for a well-known corporation.  I love my job!  I’m making $13.00 an hour and usually put in over time making $19.50 an hour.  So all within a year I’ve made a $6 (or $12) raise!

I can afford to live on my own, pay my bills, pay off debt from my surgery, and even educate myself!

I’m going to UVU now for art and visual communications.  My first few terms there were hard.  I ended up taking a two-term break then just started up again this term.  I’ve enjoyed every moment!  I’ve learned so much about painting and about American history.  I know for sure I’m an artist.  No more confusion on majors.  I’m annoyed by the lack of knowledge on a lot of American’s part as far as our government goes.  No, I wont start a rant here.  I’m intrigued at what President-Elect Obama can do for us. I am a republican. But I’m not someone who would have voted for Mr. Obama.  I actually didn’t want to vote for McCainn.  But I would have chosen him because I agreed more with him on some topics than I did with Obama…  In my past voting I’ve voted straight ticket, by pure coincidence.

My best friend Sarah, when we were growing up – even now, impressed me with her knowledge of things.  I always wanted to be like her.  Smart, educated, “in-the-know”… At times I never thought it could be me.  But then I realized that the ability to be smart and educated was in me all along.  If I want things, I need to go out and get them.  You can succeed in ANYTHING you set your mind to.  Your up bringing does not hold you back!

There’s a poem I was given when I entered Young Women’s, printed lovingly on a white lace doily. It read:

“Be The Best That You Can Be.

Pursue Your Goals Persistently.

Make Your Fondest Dreams Come True.

And Most of All,

Believe In You.”

I remember thinking it was a pretty quote and just hung it on my wall for years.  I never thought about the meaning until a few years ago.  “Too big of words” I’d tell myself when I was younger. “Pursue”??? “Persistently”… “Fond”??? What????!!!!!

I understand it now.

So as I step through the doors of Abravanel Hall tonight and look around at all the culture and splendor before me, it’ll be more than just a cello concerto to me.  It’ll be the realization that I’ve made something of myself.  I’ve been persistent and pursued goals that seemed an unobtainable dream.  They weren’t easy to achieve.  There’ve been tears, heartache, and great depression fighting for this moment.  But I can now say I’ve made it.